how can u be prego again
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
