and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Randomize
