Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
He felt like a one man threesome
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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