suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
