don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
