So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
