I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
