she woke up with a sticky ear
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
