ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
