If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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