I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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