I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
