we're blogging at a bar
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
