On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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