the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
