so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
