so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize