Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I just gargled with NyQuil
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