how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
