i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I think I won the penis lottery.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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