Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
