he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Randomize
