Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
