brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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