Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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