I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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