But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
