Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
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