have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
