yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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