The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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