Betty ford says i'm here all night
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
