I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Drake has all the answers
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
