The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
