Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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