I just threw up on my dentist
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
