how can u be prego again
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
