I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I forgot wine drunk hurts
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize