True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
