Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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