I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I'm drive I can fine osifer
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I love you.
Bad choice
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