You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
