I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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