I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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