if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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