Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
