Tell her she can't have a vagina
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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