There is no way he is gay with that hair.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
