So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
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