I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
You're breaking my sexual little heart
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
